Monday, January 28, 2013

spring is in the air.

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I know for sure I am jumping the gun on this one, but I swear I can feel spring in the air. Never mind the weather, there is just something deep down in me that seems to be subconsciously shedding all the old "baggage"...fear and doubt that maybe I've been holding onto for far too long, making way for new patterns of thought, faith, and optimism. Aaron told me a month or two ago that I was seeming "older". It was a little random, but I was fascinated by the idea. Me? Growing up? I asked him, "What do you mean?!", and I don't think he had a very specific answer for me. But I've tricked him into telling me the same thing a few times since then, and every time I consider it the highest compliment one person could give to another, because honestly, isn't that all we want? To know that our experiences and struggles in life aren't just all for naught? That we come out on the other side having grown and progressed even a tiny, tiny bit? To think maybe I'm getting somewhere in this continuum called "life" is an encouraging thought.

It was a little rainy the end of last week, but today was more than beautiful. The gardeners were outside this morning pruning the branches of the huge tree that grows right outside our front door, and when I got home from work this afternoon I opened all the blinds to let in all the fresh new light. Light was streaming in like it had never streamed in before, it seemed. I could finally see parts of our living room I had forgotten even existed! Colors were more vibrant, and everything was more clear. (Yes, our apartment really IS that dim most of the year...that blasted tree!) I've had a few moments of clarity in my life that I will always remember, and every time seems to involve light. Today was one of those moments. I puttered around for a little while, straightening pillows, emptying the dishwasher, wiping the counters, and thinking to myself of a nonspecific time in the future when everything would all eventually fit together perfectly.

**To go with this post is a silly GIF (because all GIFs are silly) with some photos taken after church yesterday. Did I mention I chopped off about 6 inches of my hair the Thursday before last? It's taken me over a week to get used to the new length, and I would maybe regret cutting so much off, except that my hair is just one huge tangle when it gets too long. Ohh, the joys of having baby fine hair.